You don't need an hour: simple mindfulness for busy carers

When you're caring for someone else, finding time for yourself can feel almost impossible. There is always something else to do, someone else to think about or another responsibility waiting.

Mindfulness can sometimes sound like something that requires lots of time, a quiet room and a completely clear mind. But it doesn't have to. Mindfulness can be as simple as taking a few moments to pause, breathe and focus on what is happening right now. For carers, these small moments can provide a chance to step away from the constant list of things that need doing and give yourself a little breathing space.

What is mindfulness?

Mindfulness is about paying attention to the present moment, rather than getting caught up in worries about the future or thoughts about what has already happened.

It doesn't mean emptying your mind or trying to stop your thoughts. Instead, it is about noticing what you are thinking and feeling, without judging yourself for it, and gently bringing your attention back to the present.

You can practise mindfulness almost anywhere, and you don't need any special equipment or experience.

Try a one-minute breathing exercise

If you have a minute to yourself, try this simple exercise:

Pause.
If it feels safe and comfortable to do so, stop what you're doing for a moment and sit or stand comfortably.

Take a slow breath in.
Notice how the air feels as you breathe in.

Slowly breathe out.
Try to let your shoulders relax as you exhale.

Repeat a few times.
You don't need to control your breathing or make it perfect. Simply notice each breath as it comes and goes.

Notice how you feel.
Before returning to whatever you were doing, take a moment to notice how you feel. You might feel calmer, or you might not notice much difference at all. That's okay. The aim isn't to achieve a particular feeling, but simply to give yourself a moment to pause.

Find mindfulness in everyday moments

You don't always need to set aside dedicated time for mindfulness. You can bring a little more awareness to things you're already doing.

When you make a cup of tea, for example, notice the warmth of the mug, the smell of the tea and the first few sips.

If you go outside, pay attention to what you can see and hear around you. Notice the feeling of the air and the ground beneath your feet.

Even washing the dishes can become a mindful moment if you focus on the sensation of the warm water, the sounds around you and what you can see, rather than allowing your mind to run through everything you need to do next.

These moments might only last a minute or two, but they can give your mind a short break from the usual demands of caring.

Try the 5-4-3-2-1 grounding exercise

If you're feeling overwhelmed or have lots of thoughts running through your mind, a grounding exercise can help bring your attention back to the present.

Take a moment to notice:

5 things you can see
4 things you can touch or feel
3 things you can hear
2 things you can smell
1 thing you can taste

You can do this wherever you are, and it only takes a few minutes.

Be kind to yourself

There can be a temptation to think that taking time for yourself is selfish when someone else depends on you. But looking after yourself is an important part of looking after someone else. Mindfulness won't make the challenges of caring disappear, and it isn't something you need to get “right”. Some days you might find it helpful, while on other days you may simply not have the time or headspace for it.

The important thing is to give yourself permission to pause when you can. Even a minute can be a minute for you.

Want to explore mindfulness further?

If you'd like to try mindfulness in a friendly and supportive environment, Swindon Carers Together runs activities and events that give carers the opportunity to take some time for themselves, learn something new and connect with other carers.

You don't need to have tried mindfulness before. Our events are a chance to step away from the demands of caring for a while and enjoy some time for yourself.

To find out what's coming up for carers in Swindon, click here.